From marble columns to seedy mansions

So. From the swankiest building in the city to the trendiest part of town... and already I've discovered one main difference.

First, a bit of background. I recently scored this job here at a small company. The temp job that I was doing in the city finished up and the lovely (but gay, remember??) man that I was working for referred me on to one of his clients. Hey- not like that!!! The thing is, I've met the people at my new office, and they are all very good looking, and even though I am a secretary of considerable means, I am quite sure that I don't stack up.

I get off the train and walk up the street to my new office. I look at my watch and realise that I have time for a coffee. A man leans out of a shop window with a coffee machine and I figure this place looks as good as any. I stop and order a latte, which is when I realise that I have been so engrossed in my book on the train that I have forgotten to do my make up! And, need I remind you that I must spend my day with glamourous people!!! Whilst the barista is making my coffee, I pull out my eyeliner, and glance closely at my reflection in the shop window. I follow it up with mascara and lip gloss.

And, wait for it, here's the point of this entire post- the barista hands me my coffee, looks at my eyes (freshly lined and mascaraed) and says to me:

Hey, that's a pretty good job. It normally me takes me ages to put on my eyeliner...

Yes, yes, I'm in the trendy part of town.

Jemima Jemima the Stalker (who is also a nerd, but you already knew that)

This morning I wake up and the first thing I think to do is check for an e-mail from futurama girl (however unlikely it may be that she has e-mailed me.) No sooner do I log in, but I get an IM from my father who is downstairs. (Yes, yes, we're all nerds here.) It is a coffee cup emoticon. I deliberate for some time. After all, I have seen the waiter at our favourite local breakfast haunt on Friday night and Saturday afternoon already. He will think that I am stalking him.

I say as much to my father and get the following in reply:

"Don't worry, he already thinks that."

I wake up my brother and we all go for coffee. The waiter thinks that I am stalking him.