Jemima Jemima the Stalker (who is also a nerd, but you already knew that)

This morning I wake up and the first thing I think to do is check for an e-mail from futurama girl (however unlikely it may be that she has e-mailed me.) No sooner do I log in, but I get an IM from my father who is downstairs. (Yes, yes, we're all nerds here.) It is a coffee cup emoticon. I deliberate for some time. After all, I have seen the waiter at our favourite local breakfast haunt on Friday night and Saturday afternoon already. He will think that I am stalking him.

I say as much to my father and get the following in reply:

"Don't worry, he already thinks that."

I wake up my brother and we all go for coffee. The waiter thinks that I am stalking him.